It's been a while...a long while since I've posted or written anything for that matter. Life has become chaotic. In January 2011, I officially re-entered school for about the fourth time...this time I'm really going to try and accomplish getting a degree.
I still live 75 miles away from where I work and drive the long trek 5 days a week to and from. My in-laws and still living with us and my wife has quit two jobs - whew!
I don't understand the whole point of school. You must spend thousands of dollars to get a piece of paper that says you accomplished something to get a job that you probably hate, but still pays decently - before you pay off those loans.
I'm getting a degree in Journalism, first I have to attend a community college because I was young and dumb and didn't show up to class my first three tries, therefore I have a GPA of .8. Once finished, hopefully, in the summer of 2012 I will have an Associates of Arts in Journalism and then will be attending University of Central Missouri to get a Bachelor's in Journalism. But what from there? Do I continue and attempt at a Masters? Do I start looking for a job in newspapers or magazines? Life is not that simple.
I plan on completing my degrees all the while, with what I am learning, writing a novel or screenplay to finance my family and still write for either newspapers, magazines or websites in the freelance aspect.
I am going to attempt to add at least one post on here at least once a week, but understand my hectic lifestyle that I will probably fail and it won't be but a few months before another post is added.
Bryce Bade
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Life, Support....and Parents
After having children I have come to realize the one main goal a parent has...to support and love their children in anything and everything they do. I'm not about to say I had a rough childhood because I didn't. My parents were good to me and my siblings, but the one thing I have come to realize as I am nearly a quarter century of existence is that I didn't receive the all the support a child should get.
Everyday before I leave for work or when I wake up in the morning (or afternoon) I tell my wife and children I love them and give them a kiss goodbye. Yes, my parents told me they loved me, but some time it stopped and I don't know the exact age or date that it did, but for the live of me I cannot remember the last time they said 'I love you', yes when they are lecturing me (and they still do it) they said that they do things or lecture me because they love and care about me, but that is not the same message that I am trying to instill in my family. My brother-in-law, who is twenty-five, my wife, my sister-in-law, my father-in-law and mother-in-law always tell each other that they love each other over the phone or in person, it's weird to me, but that is because I didn't get that from my parents.
I am catholic and my children are baptized or being baptized in the catholic church, I am not a practicing catholic, but I do believe in a higher power. But if it were left up to me, I wouldn't care that they were baptized, but deep down I have the fear that I don't want to disappoint my parents which for some god-forsaken reason I feel that I have many times in life because nothing I have done was good enough for them or at lease they didn't make it feel that way.
A couple of weeks ago my mother asked me what I work on at night when I get home from my paying corporate job. I told her that I write a blog and that I on occasion write for www.chiefsmix.com, she asked why I would write a blog. I told her that I want to be a writer and that by writing my thoughts or just random crap it helps me get better. She asked 'why' would anyone want to read that? Of course, that is not something you want to tell your children, you want to encourage to go after their dreams to be able to accomplish anything. With my parents I don't feel that if I got a job in writing, whether it be in newspaper, magazine, screenwriting or novels that any of it would be good enough for them.
Watching the way my friends parents or my in-laws have always encouraged their children makes me wish my parents did the same for me. Maybe in their minds they didn't want to get my hopes up to high that I would be able to take the many setbacks or failures, but I wouldn't be able to accomplish anything if I didn't try and that is why I feel that I can't write. I can start something, but never finish because I don't want to fail in my parents eyes.
Everyday before I leave for work or when I wake up in the morning (or afternoon) I tell my wife and children I love them and give them a kiss goodbye. Yes, my parents told me they loved me, but some time it stopped and I don't know the exact age or date that it did, but for the live of me I cannot remember the last time they said 'I love you', yes when they are lecturing me (and they still do it) they said that they do things or lecture me because they love and care about me, but that is not the same message that I am trying to instill in my family. My brother-in-law, who is twenty-five, my wife, my sister-in-law, my father-in-law and mother-in-law always tell each other that they love each other over the phone or in person, it's weird to me, but that is because I didn't get that from my parents.
I am catholic and my children are baptized or being baptized in the catholic church, I am not a practicing catholic, but I do believe in a higher power. But if it were left up to me, I wouldn't care that they were baptized, but deep down I have the fear that I don't want to disappoint my parents which for some god-forsaken reason I feel that I have many times in life because nothing I have done was good enough for them or at lease they didn't make it feel that way.
A couple of weeks ago my mother asked me what I work on at night when I get home from my paying corporate job. I told her that I write a blog and that I on occasion write for www.chiefsmix.com, she asked why I would write a blog. I told her that I want to be a writer and that by writing my thoughts or just random crap it helps me get better. She asked 'why' would anyone want to read that? Of course, that is not something you want to tell your children, you want to encourage to go after their dreams to be able to accomplish anything. With my parents I don't feel that if I got a job in writing, whether it be in newspaper, magazine, screenwriting or novels that any of it would be good enough for them.
Watching the way my friends parents or my in-laws have always encouraged their children makes me wish my parents did the same for me. Maybe in their minds they didn't want to get my hopes up to high that I would be able to take the many setbacks or failures, but I wouldn't be able to accomplish anything if I didn't try and that is why I feel that I can't write. I can start something, but never finish because I don't want to fail in my parents eyes.
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
My children
I love my children. I love how innocent they are, I love watching them develop physically and mentally. It's odd, when I try and explain something to someone I always go back and reference my children, my favorite was to two grown adults at work "If I wanted to babysit, I would have stayed at home!"
I have a seventeen month old son, who is my namesake and pride and joy. I love him dearly and never thought I would feel this way about someone. It is not the same love that I feel for my wife, I love all my family equally, don't get me wrong, but each has their own type of love.
Then, there is my two month old daughter, my wife says that she will have me wrapped around her finger....I'm pretty sure she already does and she can't do anything, but cry, poop and roll over.
My son, to me is a genius, and yes of course I understand that everyone says their kid is the cutest, smartest, funniest thing since Charlie Chaplin. But I swear to god I will fight you to the death on this issue...my kid is cuter, smarter and funnier.
My daughter, if she is anything like her mother she will be adorable, brains like me, she'll be the next Einstein...more like my attitude and she will be the funniest.
The only thing that I wish for my kids is that I would have more time at home, they have the greatest mother and the greatest support group in their extended families, that they will never have anything to worry about. But I wish I could give them everything that I did not have as a child, which wasn't much, but still.
I love my children.
I have a seventeen month old son, who is my namesake and pride and joy. I love him dearly and never thought I would feel this way about someone. It is not the same love that I feel for my wife, I love all my family equally, don't get me wrong, but each has their own type of love.
Then, there is my two month old daughter, my wife says that she will have me wrapped around her finger....I'm pretty sure she already does and she can't do anything, but cry, poop and roll over.
My son, to me is a genius, and yes of course I understand that everyone says their kid is the cutest, smartest, funniest thing since Charlie Chaplin. But I swear to god I will fight you to the death on this issue...my kid is cuter, smarter and funnier.
My daughter, if she is anything like her mother she will be adorable, brains like me, she'll be the next Einstein...more like my attitude and she will be the funniest.
The only thing that I wish for my kids is that I would have more time at home, they have the greatest mother and the greatest support group in their extended families, that they will never have anything to worry about. But I wish I could give them everything that I did not have as a child, which wasn't much, but still.
I love my children.
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